Loss or Love
by arya-girl007
Summary: Edward cheated on Bella. Bella left. After six years, they meet again. Only Bella's different. She's tougher, stronger, and smarter. Oh, and she's also a bounty hunter for things worse than vampires. Not about bitter bella Story's much better than summary
1. Chapter 1

In a medium-sized room, there were three people, two men, one girl. There was a couch, a desk with a laptop on it, and many bookshelves in the room. One of the men was sitting on the computer chair with his feet up on the desk and the other was laid out on the couch, in state between awake and asleep. The girl, a beautiful brunette, was leaning against the wall, her arms crossed, her head tilted back, and her eyes closed.

"Yo, Bella," Roy called out. "We've got another one."

Bella didn't say anything, simply walking over and peering over her partner's shoulder to see the results of _her_ laptop.

"Denali, Alaska, U.S. of A." Roy read out loud. "That's where we'll find the Black Shadow."

"Denali?" Bobby looked up from his resting place on the couch. "How does that sound familiar?"

Bella didn't look at her aid, but kept her eyes trained on the computer screen, hoping the location would change somehow.

_It had to be Denali._

That's where Tanya would most likely be. Edward would probably be there with the rest of his family.

Roy looked at Bella's face and then at the computer and then Bella's face again. It took him about ten seconds for him to recall where he and Bobby had heard Denali before.

"Oh shit." Roy's eyes widened and he took his feet of his desk. "Is it _that_ Denali?"

"What Denali?" Bobby was still confused.

"Tanya's Denali," Bella said quietly. That wasn't unusual. She hardly spoke at all and when she did, she was rarely very loud.

"No kidding?" Bobby sat up. Then he processed the fact that he should probably be a little more sympathetic. It wasn't his fault. He was just a guy. "Oh, I'm sorry."

"We don't have to go there if you don't want to," Roy offered.

Bella smiled half-heartedly at Roy. She appreciated Roy's sensitivity, which didn't show itself very often. He was actually quite dense a lot of the time. "No. It's alright. It's nothing I can't handle."

"You sure?" Bobby asked.

_No_, Bella thought. _No with all my heart._

"Yeah." She turned her eyes back to the monitor. "I'm sure."

"Are you sure you want to go with Denali with us, Edward?" Alice asked. She sat down on Edward's leather couch, next to Edward, who was sprawled on the couch, listening to the dulcet sounds of Debussy coming from his stereo.

The Cullen family was temporarily staying with the Denali Coven until they found another cold, wet, dreary place of their own.

_Tanya will be there._

"I know."

_And you still want to go?_

"Yes." Edward closed his eyes and thought of Bella for the infinite time. He saw her face and recalled the exact expression on it when she had caught him and Tanya in bed right before the wedding. A mixture of shock, disbelief, hurt, and grief. And then just sort a patient sadness.

He recalled the last thing she had said to him before she walked away with the little dignity she had.

"_If that's what you want, Edward. I'm not going to stand in your way."_

He had let her walk away, unsure of his own feelings. When he finally realized he loved her and only her, she was gone and he couldn't find her.

His family was angry, but supported him in every decision. Except Alice.

Alice had been furious. She had been there when Bella walked in on him and Tanya. When Bella left, she let loose on him, shouting and screaming at him for hours, and then she wouldn't speak to him for nine weeks straight. Things were now better between the two, after six years, but still a little shaky.

Edward felt another pang for Bella. It felt like his soul was ripped to pieces, and all he had to hold on to was a tiny piece.

He wanted her. He wanted her back so badly.

Bella trudged through the Alaskan wilderness with Roy and Bobby, absent-mindedly listening to Roy's cursing and Bobby's cheerful rambling.

She was fond of the two, as close to each other as siblings would be. It was only natural to develop that kind of relationship after chasing demons together for three years.

Roy, her partner, was half-Mexican, half-Spaniard and twenty-seven. He had tanned, but not significantly, skin, coupled with longish dark hair, piercing blue eyes, a square jaw, and a vocabulary that could make a sailor blush. He was 6'3 of toned muscles; Bella had seen him pin a seven-hundred pound raging werewolf easily. He had a quick temper and a sharp tongue, but he was loyal and a good person underneath all that idiot.

Bobby, her and Roy's aid, was an African-American nineteen year old. He had black hair, dreadlocked with white beads and absolutely no stubble on his young face. He was sort of short and had happy brown eyes and a happy smile to match. He was generally a happy person, a ray of sunshine, but not annoyingly so. The only time he was mildly annoying was when he acted like an idiot, but he was young and it was part of his charm.

Bella noticed three shallow scratches on a tree.

"Hey," she said. Roy and Bobby stopped. Bella nodded her head at the scratches.

"Shadow claws," Roy noted.

Bella stepped closer to the tree to get a better look. She noticed the faint black residue on the scratches.

"Shadow venom," she observed.

"It was hunting," Roy said.

"Yeah, but what?" Bobby asked.

The venom was fresh so the prey must be too. Bella sniffed the air. There was no stink of rotting flesh; human, werewolf, or vampire.

"Whatever it was chasing got away," she said, burying her cold hands in her coat pockets. "The corpse would've had to have been close by. If we haven't found it yet, then there's probably no corpse."

Roy and Bobby didn't question Bella. She was almost always right, and never off-track.

"Why do we have to go through the forest?" Rosalie complained. "Why couldn't the new coven just meet us?"

"Common courtesy," Carlisle replied.

"Besides, Rosalie," Emmett laughed in his booming voice. "It gives us an excellent opportunity to check out the Denali wilderness."

Rosalie scoffed and scowled, but didn't say anything.

"Did anyone hear that?" Jasper asked suddenly.

"Hear what?"

"Me."

The Cullens turned to face the frightening voice in a fraction of second. And for the first time in their vampire lives, they felt fear. Fear as prey.

It was dark. That's all that could be said about it. It could've passed for a human or maybe even a vampire if it wasn't for the darkness that radiated from the being. The mere presence of it made you cringe with horror and you knew it was the hunter and that you were the prey. His eyes had no pupils, just black irises, and he had black, matted hair with corpse-like skin. His hands were mangled claws.

He gave a cruel smile. "Oh, would you look at that? Lunch."

Then suddenly he wasn't there. So fast that even vampire eyes couldn't follow, he was twenty feet away, pinning Alice to a tree by her throat.

"Alice!" Jasper shouted, and he started to her when the thing was suddenly thrown back and forced to let go of Alice.

Edward caught a sweet, floral scent in the breeze. His throat burned and his heart rejoiced.

"Bella," he breathed.

Bella looked up. She had one foot on the thing's chest, holding it down, seemingly suffocating it. Her brown eyes made contact with Edward's gold ones. What were once so warm, what once was an open book to him, were now calmly unreadable. And yet, they still sent a shock through his entire body, like an electric current going through a wire.

"'Sup." She nodded her head to him.

The coven was so stunned, they couldn't say anything. Edward couldn't even process his own thoughts, let alone read anyone else's.

"Yo, Bella!" A tall, dark-haired man walked to her. A young boy, maybe eighteen or nineteen, African, came jogging up, too.

The paler one cocked his head and looked at the monster pinned beneath Bella's boot.

"This him?" he asked.

Bella nodded.

"Damn, it's ugly," the African said.

"You won't be winning any beauty pageants anytime soon, kid," the thing snarled back.

Bella raised her foot and dug the heel of her boot into the thing's chest.

It fell into black dust.

The Cullens stared the sooty snow for entire minute, completely silent.

"Well," Emmett finally said. He gave a shaky laugh. "There's something you don't see every day."

Bella's lips curled up into a small smile.

"Nice to see you, too, Emmett," she said. Her tone was casual, quiet. Her eyes swept across to observe all of the Cullens. "Nice to see all of you again."

* * *

**So what do you think? Do you like it? Review, please! All comments, even flames, accept. ;) **


	2. Chapter 2

"Bella." Carlisle stepped forward. He was the first to overcome the shock. "How did you do that?"

"Hold on," Roy said. He looked at Bella and then the Cullens. "You know each other?"

"Roy, Bobby," Bella tilted her head to the pale vampire family. "Meet the Cullens."

The same thought flashed through the boys' heads: _Bella's Cullens?_

"Our work is done here." Roy said, ignoring the Cullens completely. "We could leave right now."

Edward's dead heart wrenched painfully. _NO!_

Before he could voice this, Bella shook her head. "No. We should explain this to them first."

Edward gave a silent prayer of thanks to Bella. He had some explaining to do, too. He needed her forgiveness. He would beg for it if he had to.

"Can we talk somewhere else?" Bella asked Carlisle. She gestured to the snow that started to fall slowly.

"We can go to Tanya's mansion," Carlisle offered. "Or would you prefer a hotel?"

He looked at Edward when he said this.

"Whatever's more convenient," Bella replied. Her voice was quiet, so quiet. "I don't mind either. Do you?"

She turned to her friends. Edward felt a pang of jealousy for the two men. They had the right to be in Bella's presence, to care for her, to be concerned about her. To think such hostile thoughts about him. He had lost that right so long ago.

Roy and Bobby looked at her, uncertain of what to say.

"I don't mind," Bobby said.

"Whatever," Roy replied. _How can she be so calm? Why does she want to torture herself like this?_

Edward glowered silently at Roy. Who was he to Bella? A friend? A lover?

Bella's eyes made contact with Edward's once again. Another electric shock.

She shifted her head slightly, as if she were shaking her head and then looked away.

He stared at her. How did she know what he was thinking?

Edward touched his throat. And why wasn't her scent calling out to the demon inside him?

"Bella," Carlisle said. The same question was going through his mind. "Your scent…"

She shook her head. "I'll explain at Tanya's house."

The group of nine made their way through the forest, with Carlisle in the lead. No one spoke; no one knew what to say.

Edward never took his eyes off Bella. She hadn't tripped, not at all in the last five minutes, which Edward thought was a miraculous feat for her.

And she had become lovelier. Not older. She still looked like she seventeen, another miracle, but she had become even more beautiful, if that was possible. The features of her face had become more defined, her once delicate, doll-like skin was now firmer, more muscular, and her curves-Edward was too stunned to be embarrassed about noticing-were quite…curvy. And top it off was a cascade of wavy brown locks. To another, she was in the league of Alice or even Rosalie. To Edward, she was the most beautiful woman he had laid eyes on.

He yearned to hear Bella's voice, however quiet it may be. It had been too long, far too long since he heard it.

_It's your own fault_, a little voice inside whispered. _You can't blame anyone but yourself._

Didn't Edward know it?

Tanya had caught the scent of the Cullens and another faintly familiar scent. Curious to see why they were back already, Tanya left the comfort of the mansion and rushed into the forest. Of course, the effort was made mostly because she wanted to see Edward.

It was such a pity that Edward couldn't move on from that human child, Bella. Perhaps if he did, then they could actually have a real relationship, instead of being just friends…with benefits.

_Hope spring eternal in the heart_, Tanya thought idly as she ran. She slowed down to a stop when she approached the Cullen family, a smile making its way on her lovely face. That smile stopped dead on its tracks when she saw the brunette with the family.

"Tanya," Carlisle said cautiously. "You remember Bella."

"Of course I do." Tanya forced a smile. "Good to see you again."

To be perfectly honest, Tanya had tried her hardest to forget when she had first met Bella. She felt a flash of guilt as an image of Bella's hurt expression flashed through her mind.

Bella nodded back. "Likewise."

"We were hoping to talk to Bella and her friends in your house," Esme said gently.

_Why?_ "Of course."

Bella sat down on Tanya's white leather couch, in between Roy and Bobby. Alice, Edward, and Jasper sat across from them, while Tanya sat on the chair. Everyone else simply took their places on the ground. Carlisle had explained how they ran into Bella to Tanya on the way back.

"Roy, Bobby, and I work for a government agency called Nimbus," Bella began. Edward relaxed at the sound of her voice. "Contrary to your beliefs, the government is not unaware of your supernatural status."

"Does the Volturi know?" Carlisle asked.

"About a hundred years ago, they made an alliance with the United States government. The Volturi would keep the vampires in check and the United States will not reveal their secret to the world. To this day the alliance still holds. However, Nimbus has its own methods for keeping vampires and such on check. It has agents, bounty hunters you could say, that they send out all around the world. Roy is my partner, and Bobby is our aide."

"I prefer agent-in-training," Bobby cut in, grinning.

"Nimbus hunts down Red Vampires-vampires that drink human blood, corrupt werewolf packs, Shadows, and anything else that is a threat."

"Does that include vegetarian vampires?" Alice asked.

"No. Nimbus keeps an eye on people like you, but they don't alert you of their presence unless there's a problem.

"What was the thing that attacked me earlier?"

Bella's eyes flickered, showing a quick flash of anger, before returning to their usual calm. "That was a Black Shadow. They prey on humans, vampires, and werewolves."

"There's something that actually preys on vampires?" Carlisle asked.

"There's always something more dangerous out there," Roy muttered darkly.

"If a Black Shadow is powerful enough to kill a vampire, then how come you were able to kill it?" Emmett asked. "Last time we checked, you were human. And a clumsy one at that."

Bella looked amused. "There are some humans-very few-who are born with the 'Nimbus' gene. They gain the ability, at some point in their lives, to be able to defend themselves from vampires and Shadows and such. Super strength, incredible speed, heightened senses, longer life spans, and such are a direct result of this gene. I suppose you could say I was a late bloomer."

Edward stared at her in disbelief.

"So that's how you've been spending your life. Chasing after bloodthirsty vampires and demons?" he demanded, outraged.

Roy glared at him, feeling the need to protect his partner. "I don't think what she does is any of your business."

Edward opened his mouth to reply, but Bella beat him to the punch.

"I'm not that seventeen year old girl you met in Forks anymore," she said softly. "I can take care of myself."

If only now Edward could make himself believe that.


	3. Chapter 3

"Bella," Esme said. "What exactly happened to you?"

Edward saw sadness in Bella's eyes, and he felt a burning stab to his chest.

"That's another story for another time."

_Don't say anything Bella_, Roy thought. _They don't deserve to know anything._

No, Edward silently agreed. They didn't.

Bella stood up. So did Edward, along with Bobby and Roy.

Roy understood perfectly. "Now we're done here. It's time for us to leave."

"What?" Alice exclaimed. She jumped up and grabbed Bella's hand. "You just got here. You can't leave."

Edward was frozen, frightened of the concept of Bella leaving.

But, you see, Bella was not thinking of leaving.

"Where's Irina and Kate?" she demanded.

"Kate's in the city, and Irina's out hunting," Tanya replied. She didn't like the worry in Bella's eyes. "Why?"

"Why?" Bella was already on the move, rushing to the door. "Because there's another hungry Black Shadow out there, and Irina makes a delicious vampire sundae."

"Hold on, Bella." Roy was at her side in a flash. He grabbed her arm. "We killed the Black Shadow, remember?"

"Its eyes were black," Bella shot back furiously. "Black, Roy. If it had released venom, then its eyes would've been red."

Roy's eyes widened in horrifyed realization. "We're coming with you."

"No, you're not. You're both going to stay here and make sure the Black Shadow doesn't come here." She was out the door before she even finished.

Roy caught the door.

"What are you, stupid? We're cops, not babysitters!" he shouted after her. He kicked the door shut angrily. "Fuck!"

He turned to face the eight vampires and the other idiot. "What are you looking at?"

"You let her go?" Edward demanded. He tried to follow Bella out, but Roy caught his arm.

"You heard her," he barked, pushing Edward back roughly. "Stay put."

Edward stood up to his fullest hight and growled, his eyes black sparks. "Make me."

Roy glared right back, moving to make the first punch, but Bobby was there a the speed of lightening-something very impressive for just a trainee-and caught Roy's arm.

"Come on, man," he said gently. "What would Bella think?"

Roy opened his mouth to say something and then shut it. _Bella doen't know what's best for herself if she talked this bastard again._

But he shrugged off Bobby's hand and gave Edward one last dark look before stomping away.

Bobby watched him go, disapproval in his brown eyes. He turned to Edward. "Sorry about that. He gets like that sometimes but he's not a bad guy."

Edward's clenched fists loosened. "I apologize, too. I shouldn't have done that.

Bobby shrugged and turned away. "Just don't leave."

He went to sit next to Roy on the couch.

* * *

Bella raced through the woods, silently cursing herself for her stupidity, searching for Irina.

She stopped and sniffed the air, not unlike a dog.

Shadow. Vampire. She set to the scent.

* * *

**I'm so sorry for the long wait and the short update! My computer's acting up again and I've got a lot of homework. I've have a longer update by Monday.**


	4. Chapter 4

Bella heard a scream and immediately ran towards it, detecting a Shadow's scent. She cursed as she sprinted.

_Damn, Damn, Damn._

* * *

"Edward, may I have a word with you?" Alice tilted her head towards the window.

"Don't go out there unless you want to be Shadow lunch," Roy grumbled from the couch. He paused. "Not that I would mind."

Bobby nudged Roy's ribs. "Come on, man."

"Fine, then," Alice said. "Upstairs. Now."

She gave Edward a glare, daring him to disobey her. Edward followed her meekly.

They went to Tanya's bedroom. Alice closed the door.

"I don't think you should ask Bella to take you back, yet," Alice said, getting straight to the point. She spoke quietly and swiftly, so anyone who would try to eavesdrop wouldn't be able to understand, vampire or not.

Edward stared at her in disbelief.

"How could you say that, Alice?" he asked incredulously. The one person he thought would be on his side...

"Look, I've tried to see your future together, but it's cloudy. I don't even get flashes of possibilities," Alice explained. "She's changed, Edward. Get to know her first. Earn her trust back; some wounds don't heal easily."

Edward flinched, remiscing how he had hurt Bella.

"I don't want her chasing those godforsaken creatures," Edward snapped.

"If it weren't for her chasing those godforsaken creatures, I would be dead," Alice said flatly. "She's stronger and tougher and she's grown up. Bella can take care of herself now. I would bet everything I can own and can borrow that she won't allow for anyone to coddle her. If you try to, I can guarantee you'll end up under those marvelous boots of hers. By the way, I'll have to ask her where she got those."

Edward ran a hand through his hair.

"What exactly do want me do, Alice?" Edward demanded, furious.

"Certainly not what you did six years ago," Alice said sharply. Edward flinched again. "I'm not going to baby you, Edward. What you did to her was cruel, and that was the second time you let her go. Any normal person wouldn't even look at you, let alone go after your lover's sister."

"So what am I suppose to do? Just let her go, again?" Edward asked, in despair. He sat down on Tanya's bed and buried his face in his hands.

Alice touched Edward's shoulder, sympathetic. "Of course not. If you do that, I'll personally give you a long, painful death. Just... just, give her time. Give yourself time."

Everyone deserved a second chance. But do you really think that Edward deserves a third?

Edward and Alice heard Tanya's scream from downstairs and registered Bella's scent. They both came rushing down.

Bella was back, with Irina in her arms. Edward stared, never seeing a vampire in such dire straits.

Irina's arms were mangled, her face scratched ferociously. Her leg was twisted to an odd angle and she was gasping for air, but she was unconscious. The worst part was the single deep wound that slashed through her chest, dripping a blackish-red liquid onto Bella's clothes.

Tanya was hysterical. She tried to take Irina from Bella, but Bella shook her head furiously. Bobby and Roy were at her side in an instant.

"Where's the bedroom?" she demanded.

"Upstairs, to the left!" Bella was gone in a flash, along with Irina, Bobby, and Roy.

"Carlisle, come upstairs, now!" Bella's voice floated from the upstairs. "Everybody else, stay out!"

Carlisle started upstairs, but Tanya caught his arm.

"Please save her," Tanya begged, her eyes pleadingly frantic. " Do anything. I don't care what you have to do, just save her."

Carlisle nodded, and then bounded up the stairs to the bedroom.

_Go to her_, Alice thought.

Edward shook his head slightly, but after a moment, he went and huddled a shaking Tanya into his arms.

Why did everything have to be so damn complicated?

* * *

**I'm so sorry! My computer won't work and I had to do this another person's house. I wanted to make this longer, but I didn't have much time. **

**By the way, if you want Tanya to be a stupid bimbo, you're out of luck. I want to give Tanya actual feelings. And of course, Edward won't be portrayed as Mr. Perfect. I get really annoyed by that.**

**Forgive me, and please, please, please REVIEW!!!**


	5. Chapter 5

Kate paced back and forth impatiently, slowly losing her mind, already back from the city. Tanya was losing her mind slowly in Edward's arms, silently panicking. Alice repeatedly told them both that Irina would be alright, but neither were reassured.

Irina had been in the bedroom for three hours with Bella, Carlisle, Bobby, and Roy. Only God knew what they were doing. Well, God, Edward, and Alice, but that's beside the point.

Edward absentmindedly stroked Tanya's hair, wishing it was Bella's.

They heard footsteps and they jumped up to greet Bella.

"How is she?" Tanya asked. Bella's eyes flickered to her and Edward's joined hands and then swiftly back to Tanya's eyes before she answered,"She's awake. You should go see her."

Kate and Tanya-who ripped her hand away from Edward's-bounded up to the bedroom to go see their sister. All but one of the Cullens were not far behind. Guess who stayed behind?

Edward smiled his trademark crooked smile, half-heartedly. "Ladies first?"

Bella let a small smile grace her own lips and tilted her head to the stairs. He followed her up, barely able to keep himself from burying himself in her hair. Her scent was no longer a deadly temptation, but a tantalizing perfume.

Edward suppressed a groan. A tantalizing, seductive floral perfume that didn't call to his inner beast, but the primitive human instincts. He still wanted to take her, but in a completely different way.

He opened the door for Bella, reminding himself that he was a gentleman and that he was going to treat Bella like the lady she was. He caught sight of Irina.

She looked far better than she did a few hours ago. Bandages covered her wounds; fresh,crisp, and white. She was sitting up, talking almost animatedly to Tanya and Kate until she say Bella. Her thoughts darkened.

_She-devil._

Edward's hand twitched as he restrained himself from fisting it. Irina still blamed Bella for Laurent's death, even after she had saved Irina's life.

"What do you want?" she snapped at Bella. Her eyes flashed red while Bella's maintained a sympathetic calm. Roy rolled his eyes, thinking that if Irina was a man, he would pummel her.

"Don't get worked up," Bella said patiently. "You need rest."

Irina opened her mouth to call her some obsene name but Bella turned around and walked away. Edward made a move to go after her but Alice's voice floated into his head.

_Let her go_, Alice thought. _She's not upset._

Edward gave a frown to Alice. She grinned. _Just wait and see what happens next._

Roy's cellphone rang. He flipped it opened. "What?"

Roy jumped up when he heard the response. "You're kidding." He didn't sound happy. "No way in fucking hell." He sounded furious.

Edward grinned when he heard the reason in Roy's mind. "I don't care, there's no way. Send somebody else. It was _your_ screw-up."

He paused, listening, and then barked into the phone: "Screw you." He hung up.

"We staying," Roy said to Bobby. "For two more months."

"What?" Now it was Bobby's turn to be suprised. "Why?"

"Something about a small colony of Shadows moving in here or something," Roy grunted. He sat back down. "Guess who gets to track down each and every one of them for the next sixty days?"

Edward turned around and walked away, pulling a Bella, not quite being able to wipe the wide grin on his face.

Two months. Not that long, huh? How much trouble can you get into, how much drama can you stir in two months?

Anyone who says not much has obviously never met this lot.

* * *

**I'm SO SORRY!!! It's been a busy week. I know it's short, but it's all I can manage for now.**

**Do you like it so far? I fully plan on working on this so please send comments. Heck, I might even put some of your ideas in Loss or Love. I know, yuck on the title. But THANK YOU to all those who reviewed.**

**On another note, I'm going to make Irina sort of a bitter, angry character. I never liked the fact that she fell in love with Laurent. He betrayed her and tried to kill Bella and she still loves him. Doesn't make much sense to me, but then again, I'm not a romantic.**

**So...Please review.**


	6. Chapter 6

Edward stepped outside, joining Bella in the porch.

"Are you alright?" he asked. She was leaning against a wooden column staring up at the stars. The moonlight bathed her in its silver light, fitting to her every curve, sinfully calling to every primitive instinct in him. Edward stared at her, unabashed, for he did not care if she knew that he thought her beautiful. He would most definitely prefer it.

A small, knowing smile made her lips curve upwards. She kept her gaze on the stars, as if she deciper some meaning in them that he could not. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Irina was being very rude to you. I don't why you wouldn't take offense."

Bella laughed, a sweet, innocent sound. It was the same laugh he had heard six years ago and he smiled automatically, happy to hear his absolutely melody again. "Edward, if I took offense for everytime some one was rude to me, then I would have shut myself away long ago out spite to myself and to the entire world. Irina has been through a lot today and I'm not suprised to see that she's angry."

"You have gone through quite an ordeal today," Edward said. "Don't you have the right to be angry?"

Her smile faltered, if only for a fraction of a second. Her eyes became a shrouded veil once again and Edward internally kicked himself for his stupidity. "I'm tired of being angry, Edward. I had become tired of being angry when I could be happy instead. It's not the way I want to live. Espically when I have to encounter darkness and hatred every day."

"Why?" Edward asked. "Why do you submit yourself to this life then?"

"Because there is darkness and hatred," Bella said. "And I can make some of it disappear every day. Not all of it. Not even a lot. But enough to keep trying the next day."

Edward was silent, and so was she. It was a good reason, a noble one even. Her intentions were so good, so pure, so Bella. Another painful reminder of what he had, and how he had cast it aside so easily.

"I'm sorry."

Bella glanced at Edward, startled. "Sorry for what?"

"For everything."

"Edward, after years of self-tormant, you had every right to try and obtain happiness for yourself."

He stared at her in disbelief, contemplating shaking her by the shoulders until she realized how foolish what she was saying sounded.

"And what about you?" he asked, barely being able to choke back the emotion. "You weren't hurt in my valiant quest for happiness? You don't regret every single moment you spent with me?"

"No, I don't," Bella said. There was nothing but truth in her eyes when she looked at him. "I don't regret every single moment I spent with you. I don't regret having a family who loved me and accepted me as their own without question and without doubt **(yeah, yeah, I know, Rosalie, but let's not try to ruin Bella's speech). **I don't regret the fact that I had been able to come to you and talk to you about anything and everything, so easily it was like I was talking to myself. I don't regret the fact that you gave me some of the happiest moments of my life. The only thing I could possibly regret was that I had lost you. That was a hard blow, the hardest that I had ever had to deal with, even with the knowledge that you were happy where ever you were. But that's the only thing that I could regret because of you. I regret losing us. Because what we had was the strongest thing that I had ever felt."

She stared fiercely into his golden eyes and Edward stared back. Finally words came back to him. "I regret that too."

Bella smiled, amused. "The funny thing was, neither of us could rememeber that before we were what we were-" They hadn't been lovers, Edward had made sure of that, and 'couple' wasn't a strong enough word. "-we were friends."

Edward grasped the meaning of her words. "Would you like to be friends again?" he asked, smiling despite himself.

Bella grinned, and Edward saw his sweet, innocent, seventeen-year-old Bella again.

"Yes," she replied in her quiet voice. "I think I'd like that."

* * *

**Sorry for the late update, but better late than never. So anyway, to anybody who's a little confused about the end of the chapter, no they're** **not back together, they're just friends.**


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